Sunday, June 27, 2010


Black Women Dating White Men  Make It Work

Black women dating white men is something you see more and more today. While this always happened, it's simply more accepted today as the world is becoming less racist. Unfortunately, there are areas where people may still stare and being openly disapproving. But you should do what you want and not worry about what other people think.

For black women dating white men, the same guidelines as dating any man apply. But on the other hand, the only difference isn't just the color of your skin. Because there's a different race, that means there's a different cultural heritage.

It may be important to you that he understands your culture. You shouldn't feel that this is an unreasonable request! If you have a strong sense of cultural pride, then he should at least be able to understand this. If he's unwilling to learn at least a little about your heritage, it may be time to move on.

By the same token, he may have a certain heritage you're not aware of. Some people have a strong sense of history in their families. He may relate very strongly to a specific European culture. Or he may have Native American roots, or ancestors from other cultures.

It's a mistake to think that a white person has no real heritage. Often, white people are viewed as just a mixture of a variety of cultures and that's not always the case. If you want him to have a sense of your heritage, then at least ask about his and find out what you can.

Black women dating white men sometimes make the mistake in thinking that there are no differences. But different cultures automatically have some differences in courtship. You may have to essentially teach your man how you expect to be treated.

If you have a strong sense of pride in your heritage and culture, you may be the first woman like that he's dated. It's important not to overwhelm him with this independence. But at the same time, you have to be who you are.

Be open and honest with him about how you expect to be treated. This is probably the best way to make sure you're not just a novelty. If he's just wanting to date black women because it gets him attention or is something different, you can weed that out right away.

Of course, don't think every man is like that. Don't view every white man who is interested in you as someone who just wants the novelty of dating a different race. But be aware that there will be men like that, and watch out for them.

The best thing to do is make it clear you're not a novelty by commanding respect from the very beginning. That's the best way to make sure you're treated exactly as you want to be treated. Black women dating white men who make it clear that they deserve only the best are the ones who end up with exactly what they're looking for.


Women On Dating  Learn What They Want

Listening to women on dating is a good way to figure out how to succeed in the dating arena. The entire face of dating has changed, especially with the popularity of Internet dating and matchmaking. Some people have long relationships before they even date for the first time because they talk online. But women on dating have specific ideas about what they want that can help you out.

You can get the edge when it comes to dating by keeping in mind what the woman you're with likes. If you're a sports nut and she's not a fan, forget the football tickets. If she likes games, though, and active things, try mini-golf as a good compromise.

If you like rock and roll and she loves opera, you can grin and bear it with opera tickets. But a good compromise might be an off-Broadway musical. It's just important that you make sure the things you choose to do are fun for her.

If your dates consist of taking her along to things you want to do, the relationship can fizzle pretty fast. There will be times you need to do something you dislike to please her. And you may be surprised that she will make the same concessions and offer to do things you like, too.

This shows that there's a good give and take in your dating relationship. That's the most successful type of dating—when you each give the other what they want sometimes without completely giving up the things you like.

Women on dating will also talk about how sometimes men don't understand how they should be treated. While few women expect four-star restaurants every night, they do want that sometimes. It seems that too often, men overachieve or underachieve and never find a balance.

No woman would want you to take her to extravagant places that are more than you can afford. If taking her places like this makes it difficult for you to get by financially, she would not want that from you. And if she's the type of person who would want that, no matter how hard it was for you, then you don't want to date her anyway.

By the same token, even if you're financially strapped, few women will want to eat bargain burger meals on every date. There are ways that you can treat her as a special date without bankrupting yourself.

You'll need to save for that nice restaurant once in a while. But women on dating complain more about lack of creativity than lack of funds. If you want to impress her, then show her what you're willing to do to show her a nice time.

If you can't afford steak and lobster at a restaurant, cook her a nice meal at home. This shows thoughtfulness and consideration that would thrill most women. And a nice home-cooked meal costs a fraction of a similar meal at a restaurant.

Women on dating more than anything want to date a man who's willing to do more special things like that for them.


Enjoy The Scorpio Woman Relationship

A Scorpio woman relationship is one of the most potentially satisfying relationships you can have. If you handle things right, you could be in a long-term relationship full of passion and love. But there are plenty of ways to make a mistake in a Scorpio woman relationship, too.

It's important to understand that a Scorpio isn't like any other sign of the Zodiac. They're all unique, but few can be as unabashedly passionate as a Scorpio. Just look at the scorpion for a clue about a Scorpio woman relationship.

Scorpions can move fast on all those legs, and they can be sneaky about it. They have a hard carapace that protects them from danger. And while Scorpions will generally try to stay out of your way, they have a wicked stinger that they'll readily use to protect themselves.

Most Scorpions aren't deadly or even terribly dangerous. But that sting can cause severe pain. Just like a Scorpion, Scorpios will go to great lengths to protect themselves simply by getting out the way and blocking things out with a hard outer shell. But they'll also sting when provoked.

In a Scorpio woman relationship, if thing start to go badly, you might be the most horrible person on earth. And a Scorpio woman probably wouldn't hesitate to point out to you just how rotten you are. This could come just after she's been telling you how wonderful you are.

The potential for extremes is always present in a relationship with this Sun sign. For Scorpios, things are rarely ever gray or okay, they're either black or white. In fact, they're usually the deepest, darkest black and the brightest, most blinding white.

So when a Scorpio loves you and is happy with you, you'll practically be Mr. Perfect. Mess up, and you may be the devil himself.

If you're in a Scorpio relationship, you're probably used to having your inventory taken. Your woman knows your good points and probably does what she can to encourage you to show them more often. She also is aware of every flaw of yours, no matter how small.

Scorpios are good at noting flaws in others and are sometimes far too critical. This tendency comes out even more when things aren't going well. Every mistake you've ever made could be brought up, list-style, when she's not happy with you.

The good news is that these extremes can make a Scorpio relationship one of the most passionate and fulfilling you'll ever know. Scorpio's love of extremes also show themselves in thoughtfulness, so be prepared to be doted on when things go well.

And there may be extremes in the bedroom, as well. If things aren't rose-petal romantic and slow, they're probably a little kinky and very passionate. Scorpios love surprises and unexpected romantic gestures, so don't let anything get boring. If you can keep surprising her in passionate and romantic ways, you'll go far.

A Scorpio woman relationship can be a demanding one, but one that's well worth the effort.


Separation Relationships - Putting It Back Together

Separation relationships seem one step away from complete divorce or ending, but it doesn't have to be that way. Even if you're separated from your spouse or your partner, there is still hope. It does take two to make a relationship work. But the efforts of one can turn separation relationships into something that can be saved if both want that.

Separation relationships aren't always marriages. Couples who aren't married can also 'separate' without officially calling it quits. Sometimes this is because one or both feel the need to be apart to see how things to without completely ending the relationship.

This often happens after an infidelity is discovered. It can also happen when there's been any kind of breach of trust between the partners. While many think that a separation is just one step up from a divorce or a complete split, it can be a time of relationship healing instead.

If one person is opposed to ever getting back together, it seems unlikely they would agree to a separation instead of simply ending it. So often, a separation is really just a cooling off period while people try to figure out how to keep moving forward in the relationship after a bad patch.

Some people do agree to separate instead of splitting up like they really want in order to not hurt the other person. Unfortunately, this just postpones the hurt and really doesn't make anything easier.

You should assume in separation relationships that both people are at least willing to look at the idea of getting back together. There are cases where this is wrong, but you won't know which situations those are until you try.

Even if one person isn't ready to start trying again, there are steps you can take to make it easier for them to come back to you when they're ready. First, don't smother them. Make it clear that you want them back. Once you've stated that clearly and demonstrate it with your actions, they know it.

If you keep insisting on how badly you want them back, it's liable to have the opposite effect. By continually telling them you want them back and acting in a way you think will do that, you can make them feel controlled. This can be particularly bad if they felt controlled in the relationship.

If they committed an infidelity you want to forgive, stressing the rush to get back together can easily backfire. While they might be moved that you forgive them, they may have cheated because they felt controlled or dominated. Give them space instead.

If you committed an infidelity that caused the separation, then you definitely need to give them time to find out if they can forgive you. It's not easy to forgive such a betrayal, and if you press the issue it might be easier for them to move on then to rush to do so.

Treating your partner with thoughtfulness and respect is the best way to keep separation relationships from progressing in a negative way.

Monday, December 21, 2009


Five Types Of Relationships Find Out Which Yours Is

While some might say there are as many types of love as there are couples, it’s also true that long-term romantic relationships tend to fall into certain categories.

According to Robert Sternberg, who developed the Triangular Theory of Love, there are exactly seven of those categories. Here we’ll take a love at the five types most would consider love. Any of them sound familiar?

Romantic Love

This is what Hollywood wants us to think love is. The foundation is passion—that giddy, swept-of-your-feet feeling. Along with that, there’s often a sense of emotional closeness so strong you feel one with your partner. The problem with this type of love is that there’s no commitment. Once the excitement wears off and the day-to-day routine sets in, this love can fizzle fast. There are better types of relationships out there.

Fatuous love

This is Vegas drive-through-chapel love. Love that makes you think you should spend a lifetime together after you’ve only known each other a week. As with the romantic variety, there’s plenty of passion, but there’s also a sense of commitment (hence the insta-wedding).

What’s lacking, though, is intimacy. The two people involved hardly know each other. It leads to questions like “What do you mean you ‘forgot’ to finalize your divorce?!”

Companionate love

This is the elderly couple walking hand in hand through the park. It’s also the ornery old pair who always seems to have regular spats, yet wouldn’t dream of leaving each other. Even after the passion has died down, the closeness and commitment are stronger than ever. Of course, that’s not to imply that all older couples lack passion or that this love is reserved only for the elderly. 

Empty love

Of all types of relationships, this one is hardest to call “love.” It’s really more a type of respect held up by moral values. It’s the kind of thing that happens when a married couple no longer feels much of anything for each other, but stays together for the kids, for financial reasons, or just out of sheer momentum. Often both partners still feel genuine regard and respect for one another, but neither emotional intimacy nor sexual passion are anywhere to be found.

Consummate love

Here we’ve hit the mother lode. This is the love most of use dream of finding some day. It’s everything all rolled into one: deep emotional intimacy, toe-curling passion, and rock-solid commitment. People who share this type of love often consider their partner their best friend or the “one thing” they can count on. Naturally, this relationship’s bound to hit a few storms along the way, but this type of couple has everything they need to weather those storms without sustaining any serious damage.

So which one sounds like you? Are you high on romantic love, settled into a comfortable companionship or, just maybe, you’re one of the lucky couples who’ve found true consummate love. In any case, keep in mind that not every relationship is going to fit into one of these categories and most types of relationships will fall into more than one.

Friday, September 18, 2009

Here Is Some Love Relationship Advice You Can Actually Use

Been getting your love relationship advice from Cosmo or Esquire? Well, there’s your problem right there. Popular magazines and Hollywood movies may offer plenty of tips on finding dates and what to do with your date later that night, but they rarely give you anything you can use to build a strong, long-term relationship. For a change, here are some tips you can actually use.

Build trust!

A lot of love relationship advice focuses on trust because it truly is the foundation of a loving relationship. While trust sometimes develops on its own, putting a little work into building it never hurts. How can you do that? First of all, be reliable. Call when you say you will and show up when you promise to. Also try not to make little off-hand promises you have no intention of keeping, like “Yeah, I’ll help you clean the kitchen later.”

When you have a disagreement, be fair and don’t take jabs at your partner’s weak spots. Respect your partner’s feelings and avoid telling them they “shouldn’t” feel a certain way just because that’s not how you’d feel in the same situation.

Don’t ignore money matters!

This may not be very common love relationship advice, but it is important. If you share any financial responsibilities, you owe it to each other to communicate on this issue. Sure, it’s not much fun to talk about money, but it’s even less fun when you’re in serious trouble due to poor planning. Don’t let it get that far.

Even in a marriage with only one bread winner, both of you should be involved in financial planning. To keep problems at bay, put aside time once a month (while you’re doing the bills is a good time) to discuss your financial situation. Once you get used to it, it’ll become a lot less stressful.

Learn to end arguments!

It’s bound to happen: your partner does that really annoying thing yet again and suddenly you’re yelling at each other. The important thing isn’t so much stopping it from happening as knowing how to stop it when it does happen. In fact, the ability to diffuse post-argument tension can make or break a relationship. How’s that for valuable love relationship advice?

So, when you realize your gripe session is getting out of hand, try a little gentle humor, say something kind to your partner, or acknowledge that the two of you ultimately share the same goals. If you’re still feeling snarky, take a break to clear your head.
Talk about what matters!

Ever hear people say they and their spouse lead separate lives and wonder how a marriage ends up that way? Most often is starts with a lack of deep communication. Real relationship-sustaining communication does not mean talking about when the dog’s due for his shots or when you’re going to get that leak fixed. It means talking about your feelings from day to day, your hopes for the future, and even your fears.

Keeping a relationship going strong takes trust, good communication, and attention to the things that really matter. Don’t get sidetrack by the magazine headlines because the best love relationship advice isn’t all about when to send roses or what to do in bed.

Get Your Ex Boyfriend Back This Week

When you’re trying to get your ex boyfriend back, while a cooling-off period can do you both a lot of good, you don’t want to wait too long. Once the memories of all the good times you had together start to fade or he meets another woman, you may have lost him for good. To make sure that doesn’t happen, here’s a step-by-step plan to get your ex boyfriend back fast.

Assess why he left

When you first met, you were both on your best behavior and a lot more tolerant of each other’s quirks. But be honest, after you got more comfortable with each other you weren’t so perfect all the time, were you? Maybe you started to take him for granted or you got a little pushy now and then. Before you can get your ex boyfriend back for good, you need to know what made him leave in the first place.

Fix problems on your end

Once you know what went wrong, you need to find a way to make sure it doesn’t happen again. It’s easy to blame his annoying habits or lack of communication skills for any tensions between you two, but ultimately you are responsible for your reactions to whatever he does. You’ll either have to find a better way to deal with whatever he did that irritated you or decide maybe he wasn’t the right guy for you after all.

Plan your first contact

So, hopefully you haven’t already called him a dozen times and sent six emails titled “Please reply, I can’t live without you.” If you have, the rest of this article may not help you. If not, though, you still have the option of carefully planning how you’re going to get to see him again. Stay away from pathetic excuses and go for something fun and casual like inviting him out with him out with some of your friends to do something the two of you used to enjoy doing together.

Be open and flexible

Once you do get to talk to him, let him do the complaining and you do the listening. That doesn’t mean you should give in to all his demands, but at least hear him out before you jump in with your own opinions.

Remember, even if they weren’t obvious to you, he had good reasons to leave. If you’re going to be a couple again, you’ll need to do some compromising. One good tactic to get him to open up is to ask if he’d be willing to tell you what he felt went wrong in the relationship so you can learn from your mistakes.

You can probably get your ex boyfriend back a lot sooner than you think, but you need to have a proven plan to follow. Some of the free tips online may just backfire on you and make the split permanent. When you choose a proven plan designed by an experienced relationship counselor, though, you can not only get your ex boyfriend back, you can do it without any stress and drama.
You can get him back